He felt that even while immobile, or particularly while immobile, he had to keep being a monk because that was his only value to the people who would throw him away and forget him otherwise. I'm not sure if he resented his position before that or what the meaning to his late marriage was, if anything. In the novel later, Seishin's curiosity about his father is a fairly important driving force. I expect we'll get a lot more on this.

He wanted to escape his failing health and live without needing them. Too bad you keep whatever ailments you had when you were alive once you're shiki'd.


Seishin can write all he wants if he puts his priestly duties first and goes in to work exhausted in the morning by using up all his spare time to write. Hell, I'm not even sure if he likes writing or it's just his one outlet or attempt to understand himself. Writing for others, at least, is not his aim so it seems. Ozaki putting his article out annoys him, and I, at least, got the impression that Sunako being a fan troubled him because he was being confronted about works that are actually very personal and never particularly meant for others. Granted, that's all interpretation. There was plenty else to be bewildered about in Sunako's entrance. And he might not push his works much because there's the risk of being seen as stuck up or being more proud of that eccentric side job or something the more it gets noticed by the village.